Unpublishable #6: The OG version of Starcrossed

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As announced the day before I will soon be unveiling my new story StarCX right here on my blog. But before I do that I would like to walk you through the very first version of this story, it is completely 100% different, but it’s always great to look back and see where the initial spark came from.

The Original version was actually going to be a comic book with a cover that looks like this:

If you were wondering, it is hand drawn on plain computer paper and then scanned onto my computer and inverted to make it dark and grainy but not totally black. I still think it looks cool, just I can not draw at all haha.

In my defense, I was in college..actually I have no defense, cause I’m still happy it exists if for no other reason to show me why it is important to wait and really allow a story and world to develop over time, not just rush into the first tangent that pops into my head.

And as a bonus here is the first part of that failed comic idea. I believe the only things I have kept for StarCX are names and The Great Black Nothing. And believe it or not, somewhere on a hard drive I have a few living panels of this comic which I will disperse throughout the text below. Remember I cannot draw, but despite all signs telling me not too, I attempted it anyway, thinking at the time that I would just make mockups and then have a professional do over my crap. Logic that cannot fail, and yet somehow it did…weird,


Star crossed: Part 1: Sunrise

Chapter 1: Drifting

**note I think that it would work really well if when we are showing them orbiting each other in the binary star pattern that we have every other panel be an actual couple dancing and then their movements match up and it becomes very real and romantic and of course on the last panel the couple will kiss

—-

Exposition:

To earth it is known as a binary star system.

Just two stars circling each other

Exposition:

To the stars it is a dance

Maybe a picture of an actual dancing couple (think beauty and the beast kind of dance)

Exposition:

between two lovers

Back to the stars circling maybe make like a trail that looks like a heart or something

Exposition:

That have promised to travel

Maybe a simple knot to emphasis the promise

Exposition:

The galactic expanse together

a large portion of the page showing a picture of the universe(make it look massive)

Exposition:

Until the end of the universe.

Fade to black

Saturnine:

(internal) – Just one more stop before the Great Black Nothing

Saturnine:

(internal) – I can’t even imagine what’s out there. Actually No one knows because they’re all afraid to go out there.

Saturnine:

(internal) – Somehow out of all the Gaggles of stars I was chosen to explore the Great Black Nothing

Saturnine:

(internal) – I must be the greatest star of all time, to be chosen to go on this journey

Most stars just spend their entire life circling around a galaxy

Not me, I was chosen to be free of the usual orbit

It’s just me and open space from here to the end of the universe

He accelerates towards the nebula, which is still a far ways off

———-

Star crossed

Part 1: Chapter 2: Ava’s story

—-

Exposition:

The Adora Nebula

http://media.smashingmagazine.com/cdn_smash/images/awesome-wallpapers/nebula.jpg

imagine they are in this cloud looking out into totally darkness

Ava:

I wonder what is out there.

Ava’s sister:

Out where?

Ava:

Oh you know. Out there, in outer space.

Ava’s sister:

Oh Ava, don’t start that again.

Ava:

I know…I know, it’s just.

Ava’s Sister:

It’s just what? You know we don’t belong out there; our place is here inside the nebula

Ava:

You’re always right, but I can’t help but feel this immense feeling that I am supposed to go out there

Ava’s sister:

You and your imagination, remember the time at the supernova…and that time with Siva, you’re always getting us in trouble.

maybe a flashback panel to show a humorous scene of misfortune

Ava:

Yeah, I’m sorry sis.

Ava’s sister:

It’s alright, you just need to let go of your wild imagination, and focus on your role as a soon to be mother star.

Ava:

She takes one last look at the Great Black Nothing, with tears in her eyes she turns away from the view

Alright, well I’m going to go visit father.

Ava travels through the nebula to her father

Ava’s Father:

What a welcome surprise, to see my baby girl around this part of the nebula

Ava:

She smiles with an embarrassed blush

It’s nice to see you to papa.

Ava’s Father:

So what brings you here? Do you need money?

Ava:

No, no nothing like that, I just need some good fatherly advice.

Ava’s father:

He raises a suspicious eyebrow

Are you sure you don’t need money, all of my other daughters the only other time I see them is when they request currency.

Ava:

I’m serious father, I just need someone to level with, someone who won’t judge me and will just listen

Ava’s Father:

Well ok, my dear, come over here and tell your papa what’s on your mind.

Ava:

Swirling around in little circles as she starts to talk

Ok…Here we go.

I need some type of excitement in my life. I’ve been stuck here for the last two million years and nothing’s changed but a few more ignitions and ‘novas.

Ava’s father:

Tries to interject but is shushed my his daughter

Ava:

I’m going nuts, and I can’t explain it but I feel this great pressure inside of me telling me to get out of this place and go on a great adventure across the universe.

I don’t know father, am I crazy or what?

Ava’s Father:

There’s always one wildflower in a bunch of roses

A picture of a bunch of perfect roses with one different kind of flower

Takes a deep breath and looks into Ava’s eyes

I would love to say, here’s a ticket, now go on your way and make this universe your own, but the universe is much too big and scary for one star such as yourself

I’m afraid you’d be lost in space before you cleared our illumination

Ava:

Father! I refuse to be like my sisters and repeat the same task every cycle without so much as an ounce of fulfillment

Ava’s Father:

You want excitement; try becoming the next mother star like you are supposed to.

Ava:

I’ll never.

Ava’s father

I have said my opinion it shall not change, now go back to your sisters.

Ava:

I think it’s you that is afraid of Outer space, well I’m not and I’ll prove it to everyone!

She speeds away leaving a trail like a shooting star

Star crossed

Part 1: Chapter 3: Collision

Saturnine should be just entering the nebula, lots of stars and pillars of clouds

His speed should be out of control fast

Saturnine:

His eyes should be closed like he is sleeping, maybe some zzzz’s

Random star:

Hey man look out!

Saturnine:

Wu…what?

Waking from sleep

Different Random Star:

Dude, you’re out of control!

Saturnine:

Now fully awake and realizing what he’s doing

I’m sorry! I’m trying to slow down!

Cluster of Stars:

They all scream and brace for impact, scattering in all directions

Saturnine:

Oh Shhhiiii….

Big giant letters that take up a lot of page

Ava:

Doesn’t look up in time

Hey sis, what’s going on?

She is instantly ripped away from what she is doing as Saturnine runs into her

Saturnine:

I’m so, so sorry!

Ava:

What is going on! Let go of me!

Saturnine:

I can’t help it we’re stuck.

Ava:

Let go of me you creep!

She tries to push off of him but nothing works

They should be tumbling crazily through the nebula smashing into things and causing general mayhem

Ava’s Sis:

Switch to Ava’s sis yelling to her father

Father! Come Quick!

Ava’s Father:

I’m here, goodness, what is going on the whole nebula is shaking

Ava’s Sis:

It’s Ava! She’s been stolen!

Ava’s Father:

A Star can’t be stolen, if this is some game I have no time for it.

Ava’s Sister:

No, this isn’t a joke. I’m serious a crazed star came out of nowhere and crashed into Ava and now they are spinning out of control through the Nebula

Ava’s Father:

Then we haven’t much time before it’s too late!

Ava’s Sister:

Father, I’m scared, there are rumors that they are headed for the Great Black Nothing, where no star has ever returned from.

Ava’s Father:

There is no time to worry, we must act, and we can attempt to intersect them before it’s too late

Grab on and hold tight ‘cause we’re going light speed

Return to Ava and Saturnine spinning wildly around the nebula

Ava:

Oh gosh! We’re headed right for the Great Black Nothing

Saturnine:

Don’t worry, that’s where I’m supposed to be going

Ava:

Not with me, you idiot.

Saturnine:

Look if we can work together we may be able to separate

Ava:

What do you think I’ve been trying to do?

Saturnine:

Flirting?

Ava:

Jeeze, you’re thick!

Has anyone ever in the history of ever flirted this way?

Saturnine:

Probably not, but it doesn’t hurt to make sure:

He gives her an awkward smile

Ava:

There’s my father, he’ll be able to save me

Saturnine:

Please tell me he isn’t going to go all papa bear on me

Ava:

Oh you just wait, he will be so furious

Ava’s Father:

Ava! Are you alright!

Ava:

Yes, I’m fine just get me away from this lunk

Ava’s Father:

There’s only one way to do this, I have to come around and fly between you two and you have to grab on to me as I go by

Ava:

Hurry! There isn’t much time before we’re out of the Nebula

Ava’s Father:

He tries to get up to their speed but just isn’t getting to them

Oh no…this can’t be happening

Ava:

Hurry Father!

Saturnine:

Come on man!

Ava’s father:

Son, you hold your tongue.

Saturnine looks scared

The distance between them gets further

Ava’s father:

I’m sorry, Ava, but my old core won’t let me go fast enough.

Ava:

Father, please don’t give up. I know you can do this.

Ava’s Father:

Please don’t hate me

Ava:

No…Father, please.

Ava’s Father:

You always wanted an adventure

Take the universe and make it yours, my precious daughter

Ava and Saturnine have now cleared the nebula and entered the GBN

Saturnine:

After a few slides of them just floating in silence

That’s a real bummer

Ava:

Never talk to me again, I hate you! You’ve ruined my whole life!

Star crossed

Part 1: Chapter 4: Destiny

Ava and Saturnine travel for a great distance without speaking

The way they are traveling should look random and not at all circular and neat

Saturnine:

Keeps on making nervous glances toward Ava

So…

Ava:

Shush!

Saturnine:

Oh come on! How can you still be made at me, it’s been like ten centuries since I ran into you.

Ava:

Not another word.

Saturnine:

But it’s so boring.

Ava:

Weren’t you planning on traveling this alone?

Saturnine:

Yeah, but that was before I knew I was going to have a friend with me.

Ava:

I am so not your friend.

Saturnine:

You know, you’re not very easy to get along with.

Ava:

Newsflash! I. Freaking. Hate. You!

Saturnine:

But you don’t even know me.

Ava:

What are you talking about?

Saturnine:

Like sure, I may have ruined your happy little life.

Ava:

Glad to see you finally noticed

Cheesy fake smile

Saturnine:

You don’t even know my name.

All you care about is you.

Look around; there is nothing but you and I, and you won’t even take the time to get to know me

Ava:

Shakes her head and refuses to say anything

Saturnine:

By the way, my name is Saturnine.

Ava:

Mine’s Ava

I see what you mean, it’s just…it’s just

Saturnine:

It’s just what.

Ava:

Well you know how we all kind of have a destiny?

Saturnine:

Yeah, each star is destined to a path through the heavens that no other star has ever traveled

Ava:

Yeah, exactly.

The tenth cycle before you crashed into me I had a big argument with my father.

Saturnine:

The dude that tried to save you

Ava:

Yes, him

I told him that I was tired of just staying in the Nebula and that I wanted to go on a big adventure and explore the universe

Long story (chapter 2) short, he said that wasn’t my destiny.

But here I am hurling through space far away from the nebula

Saturnine:

Soooo…why are you mad at me?

Ava:

Just hold on I’m getting to it.

Anyways we argued and it got heated. We both thought we were right.

But my last words to him were “I’ll show you.”

Saturnine:

Famous last words of many.

Ava:

You are like so weird…Are you even listening?

Saturnine:

Yes, go on.

Ava:

That’s it.

I was more angry at myself, but I didn’t want to blame myself so I blamed you.

Saturnine:

But didn’t I take you from your home?

Ava:

Are you trying to ruin the moment?

Saturnine:

No.

Ava:

Whatever. So who is Saturnine?

Saturnine:

That’s me! Why do you ask?

Ava:

No, what? Just tell me about yourself.

Saturnine:

Oh ok. Well I am just your average G glass yellow dwarf star.

Ava:

Thanks for the science lesson, but I could figure that out with my own eyes.

Saturnine:

Oh ok, I get it now. I am what is known as a rogue star.

I started my life at one end of the universe and will finish at the other end as I am not bound to a regular elliptical orbit.

Ava:

So does that make me one?

Saturnine:

Yeah I guess so, welcome to the club!

Ava:

Thanks.

You know what?

Saturnine:

I do not.

Ava:

Now that I’ve got rid of the steam, I think this adventure may be great.

And I’m glad to be doing it with you.

Saturnine:

He blushes in the darkness unable to say anything.


If you made it this far I applaud your determination! If you have some equally bad drawings or other such unpublishable works of art, I would love to feature it here with you.

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